"...to every action there is an equal and opposite reaction..."

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Judge Larry – Part Deux

What can I say? Day two and I am already adjusting to Judge Larry’s style!

Today’s marathon began with Virgie on the witness stand, while no less than 18 lawyers encircled the judge’s bench. The Mother’s testimony brought no surprises this morning, but after an extended lunch break fireworks almost erupted. The implication was that Virgie informed the media that she was going to the morgue during the break and media helicopters were circling overhead before any family member arrived. Judge Seidlin chose not to dwell upon the issue and Virgie’s testimony closed unceremoniously. Unless eighteen lawyers objecting in unison is considered ceremonious. Make no mistake that Virgie’s personality can be tougher than leather and her sincerity is harder to swallow than a bucket of nails. But, she is the Mother and does have a "dog in this fight" as I have heard repeatedly over the past two days.

Next, Howard K. Stern graciously approaches the witness stand and begins to spin a tangled web. The opposing lawyers quickly focused upon potential monetary gains for Stern, if he should be given custody of Anna Nicole’s remains. Again and again he declared that he would not prosper from such a decision.
Predictably, Seidlin asked the lawyers to warm their butts on the chairs provided and began to ask questions about Stern’s financial status. The answers, though not forthcoming, painted a grim picture of Mr. Stern. According to his testimony, he must be the least paid lawyer in the country, because he was making less than minimum wage for several years prior to his exclusive professional relationship with Ms Smith (other names may apply, many other names). Afterward, his income dropped to zero, according to his assertions. Seidlin then asked Stern a series of questions:

Who pays the rent?

When you go out for dinner, who picks up the check?

When you get a new pair of shoes, just who pays for them?

The answer to each question was a resounding “Anna.”

Stern leaves the stand with a promise to be in Seidlin’s court tomorrow.

The next witness surprised me, because I had preconceived notions about the young man. He has been depicted in the media as a young, worthless gigolo poised to pounce upon the possible millions left behind by Anna Nicole. Most viewers were pleasantly surprised by his demeanor, including me.

Larry Birkhead told of his initial involvement with Anna Nicole and how that contact grew into a personal more intimate relationship. When he could be heard over the constant objections by some very vocal attorneys, the kid made sense. His words also began to make Stern look like a modern-day Svengali.

It was apparent Judge Larry liked the witness and that was what was tumbling off of his lips, when the court ajournred. Larry B saved the day and made a minutia of sense out of all this drama.

Eighteen lawyers looked at each other with a smirk and jaws slightly agape. Then the gavel hit the hickory and the cameras went quiet. The day ended with the promise that a ruling would be issued early Friday morning! That leaves us with one more day of pure courtroom entertainment!

It's not my job to decide and I am one happy SOB about that! Bring it home Judge Larry!